Today I put on my Ann Taylor, brown, wool herringbone slacks. It was the first time this year. I styled them with a basic black turtleneck, my peep toe black pumps, and a long beaded necklace. A simple, but professional look and wearing it made me miss the professional Alison who once existed way back when. The feeling surprised me and caught me a bit off guard. I don't really miss the professional schedule, the extra hours, the pressures of a job with too many tasks and not enough time to fill. The salary that never seemed to quite add up to the amount of work I was accomplishing. Besides, I am doing what I have always wanted to do - staying home with my little ones.
But lets face it, I did trade in my dress slacks for a pair of yoga paints, some socks, and a pullover hoody. I traded in my long hours of office work and time at my desk for preparing breakfast, lunch, and supper everyday, laundry, whiney babies, and discipline, and pulling all nighters with a new born. I swapped scheduling and attending important meetings for reading time with the kiddos and scheduling playdates with friends. I traded a salary for coupon clipping and sale shopping with no salary to come by. Lets face it, the dress pants, they are a lot more glamorous - or so they seem. But I will say, that despite the yoga pants, the cries of my babies, and the discipline, I get to see the absolute joy on my children's faces every morning when they are excited about oatmeal, making cookies, a playdate in the park, or simple dancing with mommy in the living room. I miss my herringbone pants and the person I got to be in them, but I will say there is much more gratification in my children's smiles than the pat on the back at work for a job well done. I feel privileged that I get to be at home - sacrifices and all - and I know not all women get to do that.
And when I really start missing the professional Alison I just remind myself, I can wear those herringbone pants again one day. God knows I wouldn't want to miss this time in my life - just for the sake of my feeling just a little more important. :)
WOW!! This made me tear up. It's exactly how I feel, especially when I look at the clothes in my closet! You are so great with words!
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